Who am I?

Most of the time I refer to myself in relation to another person or thing. "I'm Bob's wife, their mom, his sister, their daughter, I work for..., I work with..." etc. But, who am I? Just me, not in relation to someone or something else.

I use to do everything I could to avoid thinking about it. I usually didn't have anything really nice to say about myself so it was better to not say anything at all. Then we were heading to Salt Lake and I had an assignment. "Look yourself in the eyes in an actual mirrror. Ask yourself what it is that is great. Not physical appearance, but what you perceive about yourself on a deeper level." The second part was to list what wasn't so great.

I was suppose to list 20 items for each. I tore through the not so great part. I had to stop myself at 20. Then came the great part. I struggled. At first I couldn't think of anything. But slowly I found one thing; then another. It was so hard but I finally came up with about 15 things.

What I realized is that I have unique gifts and talents, given to me by my Heavenly Father. I can choose to focus on what talents I wasn't given but what kind of servant does that make me. In the parable of the talents, three servants are given talents. Two of them work with their talents and increase them while the third hides his until the master returns. The two that did something with their talents are praised and rewarded while the third is rebuked and his talent taken from him. Which servant was I?

I know now that I need to do something with my talent and increase them, not focus on what I wasn't given. Each day I strive to increase my talents by using them, learning more about them or sharing them.

"If you had a friend who talked to you like you sometimes talk to yourself, would you continue to hang around with that person?" ~Rob Bremer

Blessings

"Count your Blessings name them one by one,

and it will surprise you what the Lord has done."

I have a journal that I bought several years ago, and off and on I would write in it. Things that were going on, struggles, etc. There were maybe eight entries each year. I haven't been very good at keeping up on it.

At the beginning of 2009 I decided to try something different. I have been writing down the blessings I have in my life and why I am thankful for them. At first it was really easy; family, friends, job, health. The first few weeks I had no trouble filling the pages. Lately, I've had to work a little harder at it. But, I still have things to write about. Some days, it's the weather. "I'm thankful for not having snow." Other times, I've gone back to my family and looked deeper at my blessings.

As I spend a few minutes each day being thankful for what I have been given, it opens my eyes to all the things the Lord has put in my life that I take for granted. I have been blessed with so much and I know that I need to remember to take the time to be thankful for all that I have been blessed with

In our daily lives, we must see that it is not happiness that makes us grateful, but the gratefulness that makes us happy. ~Albert Clarke

Daily Effort

Every year, high in the San Bernardino mountain range of Southern California, five acres of beautiful daffodils burst into bloom. Amazingly, this special spot, known as "The Daffodil Garden," was planted by one person, one bulb at a time, over a period of thirty-five years.

Every so often I receive an e-mail with this story in it. Today it was in my inbox. I'm not one to believe in chance. I needed to read this story again.

From the story: "The principle her daffodil garden taught is one of the greatest principle of celebration: learning to move toward our goals and desires one step at a time - often just one baby-step at a time - learning to love the doing, learning to use the accumulation of time.
When we multiply tiny pieces of time with small increments of daily effort, we too will find we can accomplish magnificent things. We can change the world."

Daily effort. That is so hard some times. There is always something to do, but does that effort lead you to your goal. I know that I need to be more focused each day, doing the small things, that will move me closer to my goal. I know what I want to do, now I just need to get busy!

Character

"Character builds slowly, but it can be torn down within incredible swiftness." ~Faith Baldwin

The first definition of character I always think of is "moral or ethical quality." But another is "the aggregate of features and traits that form the individual nature of some person or thing." We are all special in our own way with gifts and talents. It took me such a long time to figure that out. I think it's probably been just over the last ten years that I really started to understand this idea.

This brings me to my idea of working with kids and their self-esteem. I can see how easily character can be torn down, even when someone doesn't mean too. But if you know who you are and understand your gifts and talents, how much harder would it be to tear down your character.

I've had it described to me this way. "Standing in Power." I truly want to help kids feel that they can stand in power and not be torn down. What a world we would live in if everyone understood how great they really are and worked to help others succeed.

"You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love & affection." ~Buddha

Happiness

Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be. ~Abraham Lincoln

I can decide whether I'm happy or sad. I know that so many times I find myself blaming others for my unhappiness. "If they hadn't said that, I wouldn't be upset." Maybe that person shouldn't have made that comment, but I control how I react, not them.

This is something I have to think about all the time. I have found that if I stop and take a minute before reacting to a situation or comment, I tend to have a better attitude.

Happiness is a conscious choice, not an automatic response.
~Mildred Barthel

It's all up to me.

People

Eighty percent of humans are more unhappy, more poor than rich, more sick than healthy, and more fearful than confident. ~Steve D'Annunzio

I came across this in a book that I am reading right now and it made me very sad. This means that only twenty percent of humans are happy, more rich than poor, more healthy than sick, and more confident than fearful.

The 2008 estimate of the world's population is 6,679,493,900. That means that 1,335,898,780 people are in the happy category and that over 5,000,000,000 are not.

WOW! My hope and prayer is to be able to reach just a few of those 5 billion people and help them to see that they are special. All of us have God given talents and abilities that make us unique. The hard part sometimes is knowing what we've been given and how to utilize them.

A great point was brought to my attention that I need to share. "Think what kind of difference the 1,335,898,780 happy people could make in this world." I owe that great insight to my hubby.

Pure Love of Christ

1 Corinthians 13:3 - And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.

I love the opportunity I get to teach the New Testament this year. We are in 1 Corinthians, studying charity. Charity is defined as the highest, noblest, strongest kind of love, not merely affection; the pure love of Christ. I posted this verse because as I read it, I realized that there are many times that I have done things for others more out of obligation rather than charity.

Thanks to this lesson, I know I need to focus more on that pure love of Christ rather than serving others because that’s what you are suppose to do.

Light

We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. ~Marianne Williamson

What an amazing world we would live in if everyone knew this and truly understood it. I discovered my light while in Salt Lake and I know that I need to help others discover theirs. I will be asking for input to help me understand what is needed and how my ideas can be put to the best use.

Fear

"Confidence comes not from always being right but from not fearing to be wrong." ~Peter T. Mcintyre

Fear can be a crippling emotion. I know that I have past up opportunites because I was afraid I would make a mistake.


"Never be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the ark, professionals built the Titanic."~Unknown

Sometimes the hardest thing to do is to take the first step. I have decided that I will not allow fear to keep me from doing something I feel is a good idea. One foot in front of the other will get you started walking out the door.

Staying Positive

“The greatest discovery of any generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitude.” ~ William James

Attitude: According to dictionary.com, attitude is defined as "a feeling or emotion toward a fact or state." This says to me that I can change my life by changing the feelings or emotions I have towards something. Sounds pretty easy, but then there's reality.

Some days are rough, like this morning. I had gathered up my clothes that I planned to wear today, but by the time I got to my room to get dressed, I had lost part of them. I was already a little late, so I looked around quickly and went and found something else. At lunch I found my lost clothes. I had stopped by our office to grab something and had dropped my clothes in there.

This morning I had a very strong feeling towards my day and it was not very positive. In fact I was in a bad mood for a while. Finally I stepped back and started to look for the positive. I started to look for things that would help me to change my emotions and feelings towards my day. This is the list I came up with to change my emotions:

• I have clothes - even though I couldn't find what I wanted to wear, I did have something to put on.
• I have a job - in today's economy that's a very, very good thing
• I have a roof over my head - The house I live in isn't my dream home, but I'm dry and warm.

Sometimes it is really easy to focus on the negative feelings. I've found that I have to put positive things around me all the time to fight off those negative emotions. I read a lot of positive quotes and books. I've also stopped watching the news. I know that I want to change my life so I've started taking steps to change that attitude. It would be easier if it was a one time thing, but unfortunately I've learned that its a daily, even moment by moment process.