Monday, March 30, 2009

Who am I?

Most of the time I refer to myself in relation to another person or thing. "I'm Bob's wife, their mom, his sister, their daughter, I work for..., I work with..." etc. But, who am I? Just me, not in relation to someone or something else.

I use to do everything I could to avoid thinking about it. I usually didn't have anything really nice to say about myself so it was better to not say anything at all. Then we were heading to Salt Lake and I had an assignment. "Look yourself in the eyes in an actual mirrror. Ask yourself what it is that is great. Not physical appearance, but what you perceive about yourself on a deeper level." The second part was to list what wasn't so great.

I was suppose to list 20 items for each. I tore through the not so great part. I had to stop myself at 20. Then came the great part. I struggled. At first I couldn't think of anything. But slowly I found one thing; then another. It was so hard but I finally came up with about 15 things.

What I realized is that I have unique gifts and talents, given to me by my Heavenly Father. I can choose to focus on what talents I wasn't given but what kind of servant does that make me. In the parable of the talents, three servants are given talents. Two of them work with their talents and increase them while the third hides his until the master returns. The two that did something with their talents are praised and rewarded while the third is rebuked and his talent taken from him. Which servant was I?

I know now that I need to do something with my talent and increase them, not focus on what I wasn't given. Each day I strive to increase my talents by using them, learning more about them or sharing them.

"If you had a friend who talked to you like you sometimes talk to yourself, would you continue to hang around with that person?" ~Rob Bremer